Christmas Doesn't Come From A Store

Maybe it's me, but the Christmas spirit seems to be lacking this year.

It certainly is lacking in my household. I haven't mailed Christmas cards for several years. I'm doing no holiday baking. I set out no decorations, I didn't put up my small LED tree, and I didn't even hang a wreath on the front door. And it was just yesterday that I decided to start listening to some of my 50 or so CDs of Christmas music. 

It seems I'm not the only person to feel this way. I noticed that far fewer houses in my neighborhood have festive lights this year. The post office during my visits to two different branches had no lines just a few days before Christmas.

Certainly Christmas has become overly commercialized, with stores setting up holiday displays in August. The push to spend, spend, spend starts a full four months before the actual holiday. 

Christmas also has become sanitized. Rather than the wonderful smell of a freshly cut pine tree, we find a plastic tree made in China in the corner of the living room. We don't even have the fun of decorating the tree with the family, opting instead for a pre-decorated, pre-lit tree. I remember turning a real tree around so the place where the branches were a bit thin was at the back. Now, plastic trees are all perfectly proportioned, if sterile.

Most of the ornaments I would hang on the tree had some meaning, from being given to me by a family member or bought during one of my trips abroad. Now, people decorate their trees with cookie-cutter ornaments, made in China, that all look the same.  

What about holiday baking? I used to make a 3-pound batch of fudge every year, along with at least four kinds of cookies. Last year I think I made two kinds of cookies. This year I'm making none. I guess most people just buy their holiday treats pre-made by someone else.

Christmas parties have become 'winter' parties, or 'holiday' parties, out of fear of offending some individuals or groups or people. Christmas break in schools has become the 'winter' break. 

I remember putting in real effort to find an appropriate gift for siblings and parents. These days, people order something online from Amazon.com. Gift cards and cash often are the quick-and-easy gifts of choice. Shopping like that is easy, but it lacks the personal touch.

Fewer Americans attend church on a regular basis. But more than this, I think the lack of holiday spirit is fueled by the discord, the hatred, the deep divisions and the worry about the future of our country. Family members don't speak to each other over political differences. Friendships have ended for the same reason. 

Christmas has become so much more than a religious celebration. In fact, the religious aspect has been lost for the most part, a trend that has been going on for many years. And that's OK, because this season should embody feelings of love, of goodwill, of kindness and of warmth, regardless of one's religious beliefs (or lack of). I used to work with a Jewish woman who celebrated the non-religious aspects of Christmas.

That old-fashioned Christmas feeling shouldn't be limited to just a single day or couple of weeks. Forget the Black Friday, Cyber Monday and Super Saturday madness. We don't need to stress over finding "the perfect gift" or facing the throngs at the mall. We can take control of the holiday and celebrate it how we choose, whether that means going to church on Christmas Eve or giving homemade cookies or other items as gifts. We don't need to spend ourselves into deep debt to prove we love someone.

I enjoy buying gifts for friends whenever I see something I think they would like. For a couple of friends, that means giving them bags of coffee beans from the different countries I visit. I recently returned from Colombia with four bags of coffee beans grown on a plantation I visited. I visited the place where the roasting is done, followed by a visit to the small shop on the plaza that sells cups of coffee as well as bags of coffee beans. So far some of these friends have experienced coffee directly from six or seven countries I have visited. I don't wait for Christmas. And I don't stress over finding "the perfect gift" for them in December. I show that I care about them throughout the year.

Christmas doesn't come from a store. It doesn't come from spending tons of money we can't afford to spend on things people may not want or need. It doesn't come from spending ourselves into debt. It doesn't come from seeing who gets the most gifts, or the most expensive gifts. It doesn't come from giving one's spouse a $60,000 luxury car.

The spirit of Christmas should come from within us, and it should be within us throughout the year. Let's work on taking back this holiday, and all holidays, and spending them in a way that is meaningful to us. Let's show our love of family and friends by spending time with them, by talking to distant friends on the phone, by cooking a special meal for them. 

Remember this quote from the Dr. Seuss book "How the Grinch Stole Christmas": And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.