Keeping It Positive

Keep your thoughts positive because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive because your words become your behaviors. Keep your behaviors positive because your behaviors become your habits. Keep your habits positive because your habits become your values. Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny. -- Gandhi


This is another quote that showed up recently on Facebook, and I thought it was a great reminder of the importance of positive thinking. Our thinking truly can color our outlook on life, how we treat others, how we feel, and how we act.

It is, I admit, often difficult to be positive in our crazy, stressful, anger-filled world. The U.S. Congress refuses to deal in a meaningful way with our huge deficit. Wild species are threatened as never before, either for profit or sport. Threats to the environment abound. Mentally ill people with assault rifles continue to kill and injure innocent victims.The economy remains fragile, with millions of people unemployed. Add in our individual and family problems and challenges, and it is amazing that anyone can keep a positive attitude.

I am a pretty positive person, but as we begin a new year, I am making an effort to be even more mindful of my thoughts and words, and to keep them positive. No matter what I may be dealing with, there are many, many people facing far greater struggles.

A recent column in the Albuquerque Journal introduced a man who decided to make a new beginning, to commit to being more positive. If enough people do this, he believes, the world will become a happier place. And this world certainly can use a shot of happiness.

“No more hate,” he said in e-mails to the columnist. “It starts with one family at a time and one city at a time. Teach your family not to hate, and we will not have the tragedies that have recently plagued us.”

He urges us to refocus our priorities, to change our focus, and to try to be a source of happiness to others. What if we wake up every morning, expecting, as singer Dolly Parton once said, to have a good day? What if we focus not on what we can't do or what we don't have, but on what we can do and what we do have? I sometimes need to remind myself that I am very healthy and still able to enjoy hiking, bicycling and other outdoor activities, despite the fact that I don't have the muscle strength I once had, and I good workout leaves me more tired than I would expect. But at least I still can get outdoors and enjoy activities that make me happy.

What if we make a real effort practice kindness in our words and in our actions? It's worth a try, isn't it? We never know when a simple, random act of kindness will really make a difference in someone's day. And it will make us feel better, too.

Pay it forward.

I Wish You Enough

A friend recently sent me a story about an elderly man saying good-bye to his daughter at the airport for the last time. Below is the most poignant part.

"When we said, 'I wish you enough,' we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them.

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how gray the day may appear.
 
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun even more.

I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.

I wish you enough pain so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger.

I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye."


This story really made me stop and think. These days, 'enough' usually isn't what most people are after. People tend to focus on the accumulation of material things: money, cars, fancy clothes, a big house. They want 'lots' of money, not just 'enough' money. They want no pain or loss in their lives, even though pain and loss can be wonderful mechanisms for growth. They want an abundance of everything, not just 'enough.'


'Enough' in our society is often too much. I blogged about this a while ago, asking the question "How Much Is Enough?" Many of us have an overabundance of material things. Our homes and our lives are cluttered and bogged down with too much 'stuff.' 

What we may be lacking are the spiritual or emotional things that can make us happy and our lives whole. This little story has not one mention of 'enough' physical belongings. The father doesn't wish his daughter a big house or lots of money. Instead, he wishes her 'enough' of the things that truly are important in life: happiness, gratitude, appreciation, a good attitude. In those areas, 'enough' is all we need.

I wish you enough.

The Road to Happiness

I ran across a yellowed newspaper clipping the other day as I was cleaning out a file drawer. The contents make a perfect topic for this blog. The brief item, titled "The road to happiness," was credited to the Seattle Times. There is no author listed.

The introduction states simply that "Scientific and anecdotal evidence suggests there are influences you can control to increase happiness." The list is as follows, verbatim from the clipping:

Be grateful: Dwell on the good things in life.

Forgive: Let go of anger and hurt.

Make friends: The happiest people enjoy great friendships.

Challenge yourself: Lose yourself in challenging activities that you enjoy.

Be good to others: Research shows that altruism causes others to be nicer to you, makes you feel good and creates an upward spiral of happiness.

Let small things slide: The happiest people don't fixate on little things that go wrong.

Money isn't everything. Being rich may make you a bit happier, but pursuing wealth may require sacrificing close social relationships and challenging activities.


That's the end of the item. It is short but packed with good advice. I have a mixed record when it comes to implementing those seven items. On the success side, I made a gratitude list a couple of years ago, but it would be a good idea to dust it off and review it, just as a reminder. Challenging myself is something I have done for many years, and it is something I continue to do. And I try to be good to others (except telemarketers and others who call me to ask for money). Those calls annoy me to no end.

On the 'hard-to-do' side is forgiveness (especially people who do terrible things to helpless people and animals) and making friends. I'm in the middle on the letting go of small things and not worrying about money items.

So it's a mixed bag, which gives me a chance to appreciate my successes while still challenging myself to work on the things where I am not as successful as I would like to be. I guess that is called personal growth.