There Is A Hole In My Heart

There is a hole in my heart.

This hole is the shape of a long-haired, red golden retriever/corgi dog

I want this hole to close, but I know it never will close completely. When my dog Benny died, he took a piece of my heart with him. Each of my dogs takes a piece of my heart when he/she dies. But Benny took a huge piece.

It's been only two weeks, and I know the pain will lessen with time. But the healing is oh so slow.

I think adopting another golden retriever (Benny was number 5-1/2) will help the hole to heal. But finding another golden retriever of the right age and temperament to be acceptable to my current dog, in a state that seems devoid of goldens, is proving to be very difficult. 

A friend told me recently that the right dog will find me. I thought I had found the right dog. He had everything I'm looking for in a dog. But then the person who runs the rescue -- it's a one person operation -- told me the dog wasn't available. I was told this just a couple of hours after the person texted me photos of the dog after his grooming. I'm sure I will never know the real reason.

So the search goes on for a golden retriever to help heal the hole in my heart.