Hate

I don't get it. I simply don't understand.

What do I not understand? Hatred of others who are not like us. Why should I hate -- or worse, attack and kill -- someone whose skin color or religion or ethnicity or sexual orientation or gender isn't like mine? 

A crazed gunman in Atlanta murdered eight people earlier recently, seven of them Asian-Americans. Why did this person have such hatred toward these innocent people? Police are still trying to discover the motive. Acts of hate and violence toward non-whites in America have increased exponentially over the past four years. Why? Discrimination against nonwhites by white Americans isn’t new. It has existed since the founding of this country nearly 250 years ago. But it is getting more pronounced, and more and more non-white people are being targeted. First it was Blacks. Then is was Latinos. Now it's Asians.

I have a friend who is gay. I worked on occasion with a transgender woman. I worked with people of a variety of ethnicities. I worked with a couple of Muslim women. I have Jewish friends; I have a Turkish Muslim friend. I have friends with a variety of religious beliefs, and some with no religious beliefs. I have friends who are Black and Latino. Years ago I was friends with a Japanese-American woman. I didn't care then, and I don't care now, about these superficial differences. The bottom line is, we are all human.  

What makes some people -- white supremacists -- think that having white skin or being Christian somehow makes them superior? Einstein was Jewish, and he was brilliant. Some of my favorite singers -- Barbra Streisand and Carole King (Jewish), Tina Turner and Whitney Houston (Black), Elton John (gay)  -- aren't like me in many respects. But I still admire them and their wonderful talents. I am in awe of the guides who lead my African safari trips. They can spot a gray lizard on a gray rock many yards in the distance. They know their environment far better than I can ever dream of. I once had a conversation with a Samburu man who worked at one of the lodges where my friend and I stayed during our first trip to Kenya. He had no formal education, but what he knew about the plants and animals in the area was amazing. He had learned English by interacting with guests at the lodge. He wasn't fluent in English, but he spoke English far better than I will ever speak Swahili! We had nothing in common, but he volunteered to accompany me on a walk around the compound. Did I care that he is a Black African?

Hating someone, or a group of people, because of their religion or the color of their skin or their native language makes as much sense as hating someone because they have blue eyes or red hair. I watched a video (quiet old, based on the hair and clothing styles) that illustrated just how easily kids can learn how it feels to be treated as 'less than' because of a difference in physical traits. In the video, a blue-eyed elementary school teacher had students who didn't have blue eyes wear a blue collar, so they could be identified at a distance. These students weren't allowed to use the drinking fountain, weren't allowed to play on playground equipment, and weren't allowed to play with the blue-eyed students. She told the class that the students with blue eyes were special, more intelligent, etc. The following day, the brown-eyed students were the favored ones. The favored group actually performed better on tests as well. The students quickly learned that they didn't like being treated differently and they did not enjoy being refused things available to the other group of students.

But why do people hate? Sometimes they are looking for a scapegoat, as happened in Hitler's Germany when European Jews were blamed for Germany's defeat in World War I and for the dismal economic situation in the country. Sometimes people hate someone or a group of people because of some perceived offense. People certainly can learn to hate from their parents or peers. Some people hate out of fear of those who are different due to skin color, language or religion. Sometimes the things people hate in others are the very things they fear in themselves. Those who join hate groups (and there are around 900 in the US) may be looking to fill a void in themselves. So they seek out others with shared beliefs.

In a 2017 article in Psychology Today, psychologist Bernard Golden is quoted as follows: "Acts of hate are attempts to distract oneself from feelings such as helplessness, powerlessness, injustice, inadequacy and shame. Hate is grounded in some sense of perceived threat. It is an attitude that can give rise to hostility and aggression toward individuals or groups. Like much of anger, it is a reaction to and distraction from some form of inner pain. The individual consumed by hate may believe that the only way to regain some sense of power over his or her pain is to preemptively strike out at others. In this context, each moment of hate is a temporary reprieve from inner suffering." 

Asian-Americans did not cause or bring the coronavirus to America. They have suffered from Covid-19 the same as others in this country. Muslim-Americans were similarly the victims of unwarranted attacks after the terrorist attacks of 9/11. And now, thanks to the Republicans in the Georgia state government, anti-voting legislation targeting Black voters in that state, has become law. A lawsuit seeking to overturn the law has already been filed.

America's long tradition of discrimination and killing of those perceived as different began long before this country was founded. And sadly, it seems we haven't made much progress over the centuries. There is no vaccine against hatred. We must teach our children not to hate. And we as adults must also examine why we hate.

We can do better, America. We must do better.