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Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Unfulfilled Dreams

I want to be a writer.

There. I have put it down in black and white. I want to be a writer. I first discovered my talent for writing in middle school, and I did a lot of writing in my careers with a large humane society and later with NASA. But there were so many limitations and restrictions on my writing that it seldom satisfied my creative side. I have had articles published in some specialty magazines and in the local newspaper while I was in grad school. And I won some writing awards from the Dog Writers' Association.

Since I retired, I have written regularly in this blog. I made a book available of my favorite blog posts, but it sold only a handful of copies. Late last year I finally finished a book about my experiences -- good and bad -- as I raised my daughter, adopted from Russia at age 11. I wrote this book at the urging of an attachment therapist, who believed that my story would be helpful and supportive to other adoptive parents. To date, it has sold only FOUR copies! It is available via the button at the upper right of this page, as well as through amazon.com and barnesandnoble.com. But promoting a self-published book is not easy, and although several people have commented that they "can't wait to read" the book, few have actually followed through and ordered a copy.

So I write for the sheer pleasure of writing. I simply love to write. I don't want a writing job with daily deadlines, and I cherish the freedom to write about whatever appeals to me. I just wish that people would actually read what I write! Getting paid for my writing isn't important. But I would like to know that people read, and maybe, if I'm lucky, find some value in, my writings.

I write about many things -- nature, volunteer work, wolves, adoption, personal growth, family and many other topics. I find inspiration for my writing from many sources -- personal experiences, newspaper ads, something I see or hear about on the news or in conversations with others.

I don't have the wit of an Erma Bombeck. I don't have the imagination of a J.K. Rowling. I simply write about what I see, experience or feel passionately about. I don't have aspirations of writing the next New York Times best seller. But I do intend to keep writing. I love writing, and I love experimenting with words until I find just the right word, or phrase or sentence, to convey my thoughts. I love reading a well-written article or book and wondering whether I could ever write as well as that author. The late Albuquerque author Tony Hillerman is a favorite author, although he wrote fiction, something for which I definitely don't have the talent.

I most likely never will be considered a writer, but rather, as someone who writes. There is a huge difference in these descriptions. People have told me for years how much they enjoy my writing. But it's no fun to write post after post with no feedback or commentary. If you enjoy reading this blog, please sign up as a follower (there is a link on the right side of the page) and invite your friends to sign up, too. If you have a comment about a particular post, please use the comment function at the bottom of each post to submit your statement or question. If you have an idea for a future post, I would love to hear about it. I see the statistics. I know that people are reading this blog, from countries around the world. But please, I need some feedback.

In any event, I will continue to write and hope that some day, I truly will be considered a writer.